Am I Self realized
Knowing Self Realization
TAMAJI: Guruji, if and when meditation leads us to the state of no form, no name, and no senses, how do we know we’re there? And how do we translate that state into daily life?
GURURAJ: Beautiful. Do we really know now, even with the senses, where we are? We are at this conference center, that we know. But where are we really? Do we know that? You do not know that until you have been totally integrated and been totally centered, then only can one know where we are. So the senses will tell us of the environmental happenings, things around us, which is, of course, helped by the karma‑indriyas which means the organs of action: limbs, hands, arms, all that. And then you have the jnana‑indriya, the organs of knowledge or perception, that cooperates with the… the jnana‑indriya cooperates with the karma‑indriya to give the senses its momentum so that it is translated in action.
But through the higher forms of meditation you reach a stage where you go beyond the senses. Now, going beyond the senses means that you have not destroyed the senses, you are only going beyond it. If I have a staircase here and climb up to the roof, that does not mean that I have destroyed all the rooms that are below the top of the building. They will remain there. That I have now reached the top of the roof and I would have a greater view of all the senses that are below me. So to reach the highest form of meditation is not the destruction of the senses, the senses will remain. But reaching that higher stage the senses will be guided differently, will have a totally different perspective. And what it would take away from you is the craving, the mother of all miseries.
People suffer in this world because of craving. There are many objects of craving. It does not necessarily mean food that you crave for: lobster dinner or you crave for chicken or turkey or pork chops or whatever. But craving also has so many other forms. You crave for wealth, you crave for relationships, you crave for you name it. Everything is based upon craving. And these cravings are accentuated by the senses and their counterparts. So you lose craving. You lose lust, for example, which is also a craving. You crave for what you want to do. But yet you can do the same thing without craving. Do you see? Then you know that you have reached a step higher.
You can make sensual love, have sensual love with your beloved, and the act would seem the same in divine love, and yet it is the same act. One is filled with craving, animal passion. The other is also filled with passion, but divine passion, where you want to find mergence with the object, with the beloved, so that the object and the subject become one. That is divine love beyond craving. So you still do the same things. Like the old Zen story which I might have told you before, I can’t remember, where the chela asked the Zen master, «What did you do before you became enlightened?» So the Zen master replied, «I chopped wood, I make fire, and I cook food.» «And what do you do now after enlightenment?» So the Zen master replies, «I chop wood, I make fire, and I cook food.»
Same action even after reaching enlightenment. But the action, although it is the same to the ordinary eyes, assumes a great difference to the enlightened one. Before wood was just wood, fire was just fire, and food was just food. But now the wood becomes God, and through the wood fire is made. So the wood is sacrificed to the fire, which is also God, and the food cooked on the fire is also divine, also God. So the wood, the fire, and the food become divine and you see the Divinity. That is when you rise above the senses and become enlightened. Right. So, the wood and the fire and the food assumes a different perspective altogether.
Now, after reaching the highest stage of meditation, you would want to know what happens to me, and how can I know that I am beyond the senses? You cannot know. You cannot know that you have transcended. You can only judge it by comparison to what you regarded a certain object to be before enlightenment, and what that same object seems to you after enlightenment. So the mind would analyze. But when you are beyond the mind, when you have transcended the limitations of the mind and have become limitless, then how can the finite mind ever comprehend that which is infinite? So that knowledge of enlightenment is not confined to the mind, because it cannot be confined, it cannot be imprisoned. So when that stage is reached, nirvana, enlightenment, self‑ realization… self‑realization is when the self realizes itself, and the real self within you is beyond the mind and the senses. So therefore it remains that self and exists in its own power.
Everything you see around you in the world requires an external power. But when a person is realized, he does not need any external power to make the car of his life go. It runs. You don’t need to fill in gas, runs on its own. Do you see? So therefore we call it self‑existent, non‑dependent. And yet, in that non‑dependency you enjoy everything that you have done before in a totally independent way instead of a dependent way. You are dependent on this, that, and the other. This camera won’t work if you never had electricity. So your camera is dependent upon electricity. And even if electricity is there and the camera is there, both those things are still dependent upon Terry who is doing the photography. Right. But that’s still not enough. Terry’s also dependent upon some power of knowing the machine and how to operate the machine. Do you see?
So one dependency leads to another dependency. But in the self‑realized state the camera exists on its own, and within its lens the entire universe is reflected, seen, for the lens becomes the universe. So that existence experiences itself. There is no outside experiencer to judge it, to say that I am self‑realized. There is no outside power to tell you that you are realized, but you just know experientially that you are realized, and your measure could only be that calmness, that laughter bubbling in you, by the cup that floweth over. And when you observe these things you will know that you are existing in existence by existence itself without any form of dependency. Do you see?
Now dependency, naturally, implies bondage. The camera had to have the stand. So it has a bondage with the stand. The tripod, or here in this case this what‑have‑you is used as a tripod. And then the tripod and the camera is dependent upon Terry to press the right buttons. And Terry is dependent upon that energy to make him press the buttons.
But what is there that could press the energy, the Divinity to function? Nothing. Nothing at all. It is functioning by itself all the time. Do you see? You have your watch or a clock and you wind it. It runs for twenty‑four hours. There has to be a winder of the clock. And that is in the form of dualism, where you have the watch and the winder. You have that force, the power, and the object of the power that winds the watch, right, and in twenty‑four hours the watch stops, because the winder has not turned that thing there to make it tick. But that independent existence requires nothing else for it to tick. It just keeps ticking on and on. That reminds me of the quartz watches that you don’t need to wind at all. It winds by itself and just carries on. If it’s a good watch and lasts for years and years and years, and you do not need to touch the winder. Do you see?
So, what energy is in that quartz that makes the world go around? There is no energy in the quartz at all. Because the quartz itself is the energy, and the quartz is not aware of the energy it gives to the watch. Do you see? Too, that energy that is forever neutral is just there. And in its stillness it has its functions of making you live, making your senses do the things it wants to do.
But when we create blockages by our senses, by our rationalizations, by our minds, then the energy finds blockages, and it is not given full vent to act on its own and be itself. That is being; the source of yourself. So the whole spiritual path is for one to remove the obstacles of the mind, not destroy the obstacles, but to remove them from your path, push them aside. The road is clear but there was a storm the morning and a tree has fallen across the road and you can’t pass with your car. So what do you do? You get some help, or if you’re a strong man yourself you remove the tree‑‑you’re not destroying the tree‑‑and you put it on the side, and you get into your car and you move on to one of Gururaj’s courses. Do you see?
So there is no destruction at all. Everything is eternal. Nothing is ever destroyed, it is only dissolved into its original elements. But the energy is still there. And that energy exists by itself. And that is the meaning of true existence.
When we say «I exist,» what do we mean by that? You can say «I exist» because your mind is functioning. And your mind recognizes the various functionings that is within yourself and outside yourself, which all put together boils down to the ego self and the ego says, «I exist.» Yes, the ego has existence but it is not an independent existence. It still has to rely on an outside energy for it to function.
So we move all these obstacles aside and reach the source. And when you reach the source you become existence itself. Nothing is lost. You throw one ton of salt in the ocean and the ocean will still be salty as it was. That one ton of salt that you have thrown in the ocean is not going to make the ocean more saltier, because firstly the salt was part of the ocean and is only returned back home. It had never left. But our imaginings, our imaginations, our image‑making, our minds, our egos, our personalities which we have formed into various shapes and sizes, makes the human mind think that it is apart, the salt is apart from the ocean. But the salt comes from the source and the source is the ocean. And thrown back in there it becomes the ocean and the oceans creation of salt for its manifestation of the salt.
So what happens here is that the manifestation which we are, and that which we call existence, the manifestation merges into the Manifestor. And then the real joy comes of being, being the Manifestor itself. You become that Divinity, the master of all, the master of everything, the conqueror of all that you survey. What more do you want?
A million pounds or two million pounds in your pocket. What does it mean? How far is it going to get you? You can only sleep in one bed at a time or eat one meal at a time or drive one motor car at a time. And then tomorrow you will pop off. Where is your million pounds? Today you have acclaimed glory, ah, he’s such a great man. So wonderful he was, he did this, and he did that. How many of you remember those great men? Very few. You might have some benefactor here that would do some good deed, right, but he will be forgotten in a week or two or three weeks or four weeks or five months, whatever. But what will be remembered would be the deed.
I remember when I was busy on a project for an organization, so this person was going to donate a large sum of money for this building. And I tell you why a building is necessary, like the ashram we’re thinking about, I tell you why it is necessary. Because by having that edifice it will perpetuate the teaching. And that’s what we want. The man is gone. The god on Earth has merged away with his Father, merged into his Father. He has become the Father. But the deed done will forever be remembered. And those that contributed. Look at all the help that Jesus had, though very few, the deeds were done and the deeds are remembered. And then of course later on, as I’ve always said, when churches and institutions and temples developed, you know, they made all kinds of people saints. One day I will tell you who should really have been made a saint in our Christian scriptures.
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